TWO STOMACHS? WHAT NOW!

To all the sweet tooth out there dessert stomach is a legit thing. We all are aware of wanting to have something sweet even though we have had a good amount of food that’s because our stomach is an organ which can expand accordingly.

I have been a sweet tooth for as long as I remember, I would love anything which would have chocolate or simply if it’s delicious, the only requirement is that it must be well balanced. It has been a tradition running in my family that no meal is complete without wrapping it up with a good dessert whether it’s a homemade Ghulab Jaman or just a good old tub of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream. I may not lead a healthy lifestyle, but I sure lead a happy lifestyle. Chocolate doesn’t just satisfy the pallet, savoring chocolates could decrease depression too. Researchers have found that chocolate contains a component which reduces stress and act as mood lifter.

Let’s be the Chocolate in everybody’s life and instead of pulling people down, be the inspiration and motivate others to be the best version of themselves.

Trauma

 

Very often, I find myself lying under the sun as its rays caress my face in hopes that the warmth will seep into my bones and light me up on the inside because how must it feel to not always be grey.  That is what trauma does to you, it becomes a resident inside you and grows like a parasite. No matter how much time has passed, it sits quietly in some corner of your brain but when you least expect it, it taps its foot against your skull only to remind you it hasn’t left you. Every time you start feeling whole just like that, you’re cracked open. There’s only so many times you can scream or cry it out if you’re smart you learn to align yourself with the tapping. You learn to dance with its rhythm, it’s a warzone and no one’s giving up. Trauma makes you uncomfortable in your skin, it makes you want to pick one corner of your skin and star plucking from there all over because you feel exposed, you feel targeted, you feel nauseatingly suffocated in your skin, it no longer feels like a feeling instead it is now the color of your skin. It leads to a life lived in survival mode. Trauma isn’t big or small, valid or invalid, important or unimportant if you are living it, it is real. The world often believes it has the right to validate whether your suffering is real or not but if there’s anything I’ve learned is that you owe the world absolutely nothing. If you have suffered even in the slightest way, you deserve to heal not for the world but for yourself because you are more than what happened, who left, what didn’t work out, what broke you. Something I’m trying to learn, to unlearn the constant battle with trauma to not carry it around like armor using it as a shield against happiness, contention, and peace. I try to remember I am not alone in my suffering and it’s not people's hardships that relate me to them rather it is how they are willing to understand it, as if though they carry it in their body as if their own hurt wasn’t heavy enough and for that I am so very thankful. 


#millennial #problems #insecurities #youth #psychology #trends #fashion #idealism #depression #anxiety #passion #career #confusion #dreams #success #love #relationship

Lets talk about women today

Lets talk about something else today. And don’t disguise what i say as feminism because its not. Its basic human decency. Lets talk about women today. Lets talk about the girls. I was born into a very male oriented family. I had no sisters, and even my female cousin sisters were few. So i never really knew. Growing up, i had the honor of meeting remarkable women. Some i loved, some were my friends, and some i put on the ultimate pedestal of being my sisters. Today i talk about what i learned from all of them. Being a girl sucks 50% of the time. And i know 50% of the time doesn't seem that much, but if you think about it having a traumatic experience once in every two is a nightmare to say the least. When you’re born, you have a 50% chance of getting parents that are accepting to the fact that you’re a rehmat and not a zehmat. And its pretty fucking painful to be a zehmat. Its like being an unwanted guest..but for the first 20ish years of your life. Growing up you have to deal with the shame that lurks around basic sanitary needs, and you’re taught to hide away your pain, discomfort, and treat it like it never is. Moving on you have to deal with the 50% probability that every time you leave the home you’ll be followed back by some guy. And ofcourse there’s the possibility that god forbid you want to study something that isnt about raising children or maintaining a home, something like structural engineering or industrial management. There's ofcourse the rishta-ability, where you have to be maintain a pure reputation for the entire first 20 years of your life, and be held accountable for everything true or false anyone chooses to say about you. But you know what makes me really angry, when girls are asked to be prettier, better looking, for some fat slob who’d probably reject her because she has, idk brown hair, and he prefers black. And for the rest of her life she’ll end up feeling not good enough. That's painful. And even though it doesn’t seem like it, 50% of the population is having a pretty terrible time here.

Sufipandaslayer

#millennial #problems #insecurities #youth #psychology #trends #fashion #idealism #depression #anxiety #passion #career #confusion #dreams #success #love #relationship

The skill everyone writes on the resume, but know nothing about!

Conflict Resolution!! Conflict is a state of disagreement between two parties or two ideas because of differences in standpoints, values, personalities or principles. Wherever there are people, a conflict arises, conflicts are almost inevitable and thus require management by a neutral body. Conflicts not only leave two parties feeling adverse but is also a process of creative learning, evolution and development. When it comes to personal relationships, people indulge in conflict resolution to promote a sustainable relationship by strengthening the bond.

The fact of a workplace is that one can avoid conflict but not escape it. Before an issue vents out into hostility, the conflict should be controlled at the exact time of event.

The Method

1. Awareness: this involves coming to the realization as to what negative emotions exist in the current state of conflict. There are various indicators like one party trying to dominate the other or if one party is constantly giving negative feedback or no feedback at all.
2. Self-Preparation: this stage involves assessing your desired outcomes and developing a plan of action to achieve it. The word self in this step is very vital as you yourself take the responsibility of the negative emotions that you’re dealing with and then decide what you want to achieve from resolving the conflict. For example, you are in a room with another person and you want to turn the air conditioner on while the other person does not, how would you tackle such a situation?
3. Conflict Reduction: this involves reduction in the negative emotions by allowing the disputed parties to settle the conflict. Empathy plays a vital role.
4. Negotiation: It is a bargaining process where both the parties communicate to get what they demand. If you deem fit, bring up the source of discomfort as it will allow the other party to understand your view point with clarity.

#millennial #problems #insecurities #youth #psychology #trends #fashion #idealism #depression #anxiety #passion #career #confusion #dreams #success #love #relationship

WOMEN ARE THE NEW MEN!

Feminism is defined as advocacy of women rights and how  they should be equal to other sexes. Every single individual has different mindset with their own ideas and opinions, every person has a right to speak up and be heard. No matter from which sex, color, caste  an individual is from, all should be treated the same. But we must realize that not everybody is built in the same way. Women are emotionally strong whereas men are physically muscular, and the list goes on. Right to education, identical laws, equivalent job opportunities and Respect should be given to all sexes.

Unfortunately, Feminism is molded to be something totally opposite to what it stood for, now it basically means women are always right. Women expect others to give them a slot in front when they are in ques, but God forbid if any guy gets ahead of them than that guy is just simply disrespectful. Physical abuse is not acceptable no matter who is involved but apparently slapping a guy because he deserves it is no big deal.

Instead of focusing on Feminism let’s believe in equity where everybody is getting accordingly to what they would be needing to succeed. Humanity should be our end goal in which every single living being is treated with respect, care and love.

#millennial #problems #insecurities #youth #psychology #trends #fashion #idealism #depression #anxiety #passion #career #confusion #dreams #success #love #relationship

Khawab Gah ' House of dreams.

Picture credit.

‘Khawab Gah’ meaning house of dreams. A word very close to my best friend and upon asking she said and I quote, ‘Dreams are a big part of my life and I figured human beings are quite literally housing dreams.’ Since that day it’s a word I quite literally could not forget, something I think about so very often. It is our human nature to dream and in my opinion it is the very best part of being human. A gift that never stops giving, never leaves us. Whether it’s the dreams we see at night or the dreams we harbor inside of us with our eyes open.  For most part of my life, I have tried to contain my dreams in whatever way I could, to hold them or to remember them only to learn that I found them beautiful only because they were free. Dreams are like sunlight. You feel their warmth and their glow but you cannot hold them in your hand and keep them forever. You must always let them out in the world and always remember you were blessed enough to live them in your heart and soul whether they find home in the world or not. If your dreams cease to exist as they leave you, you must not be bitter because no promises were broken, rather be thankful and feel blessed that at the very least you had the courage to dream in a world so harsh. I’ve come to believe, my dreams represent part of the tapestry of my life – the love, the loss, the betrayal, the heartbreak, the growth, the courage, the strength and finally the freedom and at the end of the day we are nothing but a Khawab Gah.


#millennial #problems #insecurities #youth #psychology #trends #fashion #idealism #depression #anxiety #passion #career #confusion #dreams #success #love #relationship

Post-Graduation Depression: A Real Thing

Post-graduation depression , although not an official diagnosis, is common in recent grads reported as impaired functioning and massive sadness .

I have seen people graduating from college after years and years of struggles, with frequent all-nighters, skipped meals and stressed environment , but with a vision of peaceful and calm future ahead. It feels an immense pride receiving your graduation degree and heading towards home with great hopes.

This hope , pride and calmness soon changes to an endless worry of NOT DOING ANYTHING soon. Sometimes it becomes so severe that feeling of worthlessness and depression prevails.

Graduation is a great change in one’s life. A college's busy life, with great number of friends , teachers and seniors who are always there to help changes to a lonely person himself with lots of worries of their job and not able to cope to the stresses of adult life . The enthusiastic youth has a lot in his mind but when it does not work the way they thought then this adds more to this depression.

It is difficult getting job right after graduation in this busy competition world nowadays. This is one of the major reasons that the grads feel themselves being useless. Continuous rejection lowers their self-esteem and their confidence gets shattered to a great degree. Moreover, the trending social media adds more to this issue as people now compare their life to others.

Youth after experiencing all these issues usually get depressed and indulge themselves to drugs and alcohols like addictive activities. So, it needs to be addressed and treated soon.

No matter on whatever stage of depression you are on, it's important to identify it and to treat it . You simply need to give yourself space to feel the emotions . Try not to escape but to experience it . Give extra self-care in times of depression and stress. Share whatever you feel with your friends, mentors and family . Moreover, make sure you have a healthy lifestyle during this time. Regular exercise, healthy lifestyle and good sleep routine minimizes this issue to a great degree. The acceptance that rise and fall are part of one’s life needs to be absorbed too. Moreover, stop comparing your life to others and minimize the use of social media. Free time is definitely a gift , utilize it in the best way you can!

#millennial #problems #insecurities #youth #psychology #trends #fashion #idealism #depression #anxiety #passion #career #confusion #dreams #success #love #relationship